hacobozos My team's intern just found a critical bug shitposting in our codebase So our summer intern (who 90% sure is a professional shitposter moonlighting as a dev) just saved our entire authentica

hacobozos
My team's intern just found a critical bug shitposting in our
codebase
So our summer intern (who 90% sure is a professional shitposter moonlighting as a dev) just saved our entire
authentication service Бета, well, an absolute agent of chaos.
Background: We have this legacy auth system that's been running since before TikTok existed. No one touches it.
It's documented in ancient Sanskrit and COBOL comments. The last guy who understood it fully left to become a
yoga instructor in Peru.
Enter our intern. First week, he asks why our commit messages are so boring, Starts adding memes to his.
Whatever, right? Then he begins leaving comments in the coclebase like:
This function is elder than me and probably pays taxes
TODO: Ask if this while loop has health insurance
Here Lies Sarah's hopes and dreams (2919-2022), killed this recursive call
The senior devs were split between horrified and amused. But here's where it gets good.
He's reading through the auth code (because "the commit messages here are too normal, sus") and adds this
gem:
why this token validation looking kinda though
по cap this base64 decode bussin
waits.
hold up.
this ain't bussin at alt
Turns out his Gen spider-sense wasn't just tingling for the memes. Man actually found a validation bypass
that's been lurking in our code since Obama's first term. The kind of bug that makes security auditors wake up in
cold sweats.
Гре best part? His Jira ticket title: "Auth be acting mad sus по cap frfr (Critical Security Issue)"
The worst part? We now have to explain to the CEO why "по cap frfr" appears in our security audit report.
Гре absolute kicker? Our senior security engineer's official code review comment: you snapped with
this find ngl"
can't tell if this is the peak or rock bottom of our engineering culture. But know our intern's getting a return
offer, if only because need to see winat he'll to our GraphQL documentation.
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